yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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