Clothes are such an inconvenience.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
