Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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