HIV tests are more positive than that guy
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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