I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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