He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
