I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
