It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Randomize
