im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
