The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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