I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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