On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
did you just send me my own nude
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
