The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Randomize