it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
