For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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