Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize