People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
