We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize