Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize
