My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
how drunk are you?
Several
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
