When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
