we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
