Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
