ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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