Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Randomize
