Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
