Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
