Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
