so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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