i just wanna soil my oats bro
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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