He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize