I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
