I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
i out mim tonsoeep
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