9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
