I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
