We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
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