I'm gonna have a badass scar
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
