Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
