its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
