so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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