i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
