so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize