Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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