Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
