Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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