We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
