The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
