i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
