it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
