I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
