I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
