Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
