I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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